I'll let Swedes discuss if that was a custom in Sweden. It seems to me that farms became smaller and smaller because they were subdivided for the heirs, but I'm not an expert on that.
I'm not sure what you are asking in your first question. It sounds as if you want to find another Swedish website which has queries??????????????????? There are others, such as Rootsweb/Ancestry, Anbytarforum, mailing lists, etc.
Are you trying to find where your ancestors lived in Sweden? Tell about the ones who left Sweden. Provide names, birth dates, when they left Sweden, where specifically they lived in the U.S., details (if known) about those who stayed, details about who would be with your emigrant ancestors in censuses, etc.
Someone here might be able to find your Swedish ancestors in one of the wonderful Swedish indexes.
There are plenty of people who are not interested in genealogy, especially if they have to do it. My brother says that he is glad that my cousin and I research our family's history, but he doesn't want to do it himself. If you seriously research your family and get back a couple generations or more in Sweden, you may want to join DISBYT. I've found others researching the same people there and some are related.