I have stumbled upon your reasearch about the Laheys.I hope this will help you as I also am digging up info about them.As it happen I am married to a direct decendant as well.My husband Philip is the son of Eric Edward Lahey who was the son of Edward Melbourne Amor Lahey who is the son of Keiran James Lahey who is the son of James Lahey. He was commissioned to the Brittish Raj in India and was convicted in India for using a senior officers horse in jest,and when he returned to England they deported him to Australia aboard the Caroline we think.
He was sent to the penial settlement at Port Macquarie NSW.James came with his wife Mary ? James worked with Gov. Oxley surveying the area.Became a free settler and settle in an area of the region known as Yarrowich and has a creek named after him.I am not sure how many children he had but his son Keiran had 13 mst of which settled in Queensland around Mt Tamborine.
My Husbands aunt collected a gret deal of information from the Historical Society in Port Macquarie.James Grave stone is now in bad shape,hardly recognisable in the town historical cemetary.