If it is any consolation, lots of beginners make the same mistake; sometime worse. I look up obituaries for people who post requests on the GenForum board in my county. A couple of weeks ago a person found an obit for a man named Mathney who died in the 1960's in California. She posted a follow-up asking about Mathneys in the Civil War in West Virginia.
As another piece of advice, you needn't post personal details, such as your recent widowhood, out here for the world to see. Genealogists are a pretty nice bunch. The chance of someone trying to sell you a Bible like the cad/hero did in the movie "Paper Moon" is small, but still - your personal affairs are yours.