Sorry for the delay in getting back to you. If you go to my research pages at:
You'll find the address for the National Military Personnel Records Center. try writing them (SF Form 80s are on the webpage to download) with as much info as possible. If you know the name of the ship, check if they have an association webpage. Regarding the VFW (I am a member), your cousin will not be able to be a member of the ladies Aux, as she is not in the direct line of descendants. She might be able to participate as a "booster" member though, if the Posts in her area allow those.